The art of surrender is a concept that can be found in various forms across different religious, spiritual, and philosophical beliefs. From sports, mindfulness practices, and even the creative arts, surrendering to the moment is a concept that is widely recognized but not always easily practiced. In this blog post, we’ll take a closer look at the journey of letting go of expectations and embracing the art of surrender.
Learning the Art of Surrender: A Personal Journey
For many of us, surrendering to the present moment and letting go of expectations can be a difficult journey. We all have dreams and aspirations that we hold dear, but what happens when those dreams don’t come to fruition? In this personal reflection, we delve into the struggle of accepting the realities of our lives. There is beauty in surrendering to the moment.
Failing With No Effort is Easy to Swallow.
When things don’t go as planned, it’s easy to feel disappointed and see ourselves as a failure. I had my own set of expectations and dreams – playing in the NCAA, going to film school, and becoming a pilot in the military. However, my reality turned out to be far from what I envisioned. I’m now just a content creator in Japan, with a small following that may be growing tired of my self-deprecating stories.
Despite the disappointment, it’s not as painful because I didn’t put in the effort to make those dreams come true. My ego likes to hide behind my ACL tear as an excuse, but the truth is that my current situation is solely my fault. I didn’t take the necessary steps to pursue my goals. Now I find myself living a life far from what I had hoped for, but I can accept that.
The More Effort Given The Harder it Is To Surrender
As I look back on the choices I’ve made, it’s hard to ignore the fact that I invested time and energy into my aspirations, only to be met with disappointment. Society told me to get a good education, find a steady job, and work hard, but despite following these guidelines, I still find myself struggling to make ends meet and feeling disillusioned with the world.
I’ve spent countless hours pursuing my passions in videography, art, and music, but despite my best efforts, I feel no closer to success. I once loved creating art for art’s sake, but now it feels like a chore. I’ve poured my heart and soul into becoming an esports star and a talented artist, but in the end, those dreams slipped through my fingers.
The reality is, it’s difficult to let go of the expectations I had for my life. The disappointment of failed careers and unfulfilled artistic goals weighs heavy on my heart. But perhaps the answer lies in surrendering to the present moment and embracing what is. I’m holding on to a dream that has passed.
Party Prepwork
As the DJ for the upcoming student Disco, I was determined to prepare as best as I could. My preparation involved several action steps, including:
- Sending out a survey of songs
- Listening to songs and similar tracks using YouTube Radio
- Adding songs to a Tidal playlist
- Analyzing the tracks in Serato DJ
- Watching a tutorial to refresh my memory
- Adding cue points to the tracks
- Practicing mixing
- Bringing and setting up my DJ mixer lights
- Setting up the audio devices and lighting
Along with my job in an organization where I handle multiple roles during a busy time of the year, I had additional projects like a presentation to senior leadership and a video project for an open position. Despite the fact that I was exhausted, I didn’t let that stop me from pursuing my dream of DJing. Although I didn’t have a concrete plan for achieving my life goals, I made sure to thoroughly prepare for this event.
Arriving far in advance of the event, I avoided the blunders from previous experiences. The girls organizing the event wanted to make some changes to the setup, but their lack of understanding of audio equipment made it challenging. Thanks to my arrival, the setup was smoothly done, and I was pleased with the volume of the sound. I felt confident, even wearing my favorite DJ jersey, and was ready to rock the party.
The Art of Surrender When Neat Plans meet Life’s Chaos
The event started off well, with a list of popular music, decent mixes, and cue points that assisted me. However, things quickly took a turn when a group of boys started harassing me to play a song called “Cyka Blyat.” Not familiar with the song, I played Gangnam Style instead to calm the crowd. But as luck would have it, one of the speakers turned off, and a student approached me to inform me of the issue. As an adult, people looked to me to fix the problem, so I went to investigate and found that someone had stepped on a wire, ripping it out of the back of the speaker.
Unfamiliar with the connector, I mixed in another song to keep the music going through one speaker. I didn’t know how to fix the broken speaker, but I went with the flow of life and put one of the DJ Club students behind the decks while I sorted out the problem. Sometimes there’s no other option but to surrender and let life take its course.
The Art of Surrender Doing what needs to be Done
Sometimes you don’t know if you’re ready. A lot of things in life are like that quote from Into the Spider-verse.
You won’t it’s a leap of faith
Peter B. Parker
I don’t think the young DJ was ready, in fact, I had thrown him into the deep end. While he was far away from mixing songs smoothly and continuously. It relieved me to hear the music over the one speaker we did have running. My first thought when I saw the cables hanging out of the back of the connecter was. Ay bro this connecter is F#$#ed. A few years prior to this I would have just quit right there. Life events out of my control were the reason I had the confidence to try and repair the connector. My maturity, factory experience, Zen Guitar, and work to conquer my fear of failure were crucial in the repair process.
I more closely investigated I found that the wires were just stripped speaker wires. I took out the back of the connector and investigated the back of the speaker. The speaker said for +1V/-1V connection. The connector itself was made to be disassembled and once taken apart I could see how to fix it. After getting a screwdriver, I carefully reinserted the wires into the clamps and reassembled the connector. Although the process was slow, my life experience had prepared me for this moment and I was able to successfully fix the speaker in about 30 minutes. The Art of Surrender is accepting that all of our life experiences and challenges lead us to the solutions we need when the time comes.
The Art of Giving Up Control
As I sat repairing the speaker, one of the students kept requesting a Russian song. Using his phone’s flashlight to assist, he tried to help me see what I was doing. Although some adults may have found his persistence to be annoying, I appreciated his determination and drive to get what he wanted out of life. It made me reflect on my own desires and if I was doing enough to pursue them.
I looked over at the DJ, who was spinning the records and said “Ask the DJ” to the student. This was my way of following the art of surrender by allowing the student to take control of the music. The faculty asked me if the students in the DJ Club would be spinning that night.
“No they aren’t ready yet” was my response. He may not have been ready for the task at hand, but sometimes that’s just how life goes. When you throw yourself into unfamiliar situations you grow.
I watched my little sprouting DJ play that very inappropriate Russian song. I was disappointed that he caved to peer pressure, but I also felt proud. The whole group of boys jumped and danced to that russian song. My own set earlier had gone unnoticed, the student DJ proved to be the better choice that night.
Post-Party Depression
After the party had ended and the guests had gone home, I found myself sitting alone in the room. My small set up was surrounded by the remnants of the festivities. I’m often that person who stayed up late, drinking and reliving the memories of the night. This was usually long after I should have called it a night and gone home. This was a common feeling for me after a party, as I often felt like I didn’t want the night to end because I didn’t attend parties as frequently as others.
However, this post-party reflection was different from the rest. Despite the party being a success, with a packed dance floor and everyone seeming to have a great time, I felt a sense of disappointment. In addition I was proud of my little budding DJ for everything but caving to peer pressure. I couldn’t shake the feeling that nothing had gone as planned. My disappointment left me questioning my life choices and what I was doing with my time.
The art of surrender involves embracing and acknowledging these feelings, even if they are not positive. It’s important to reflect on why I was feeling this way and what steps I can take to move forward.
Seeking Fun in Life
I didn’t plan to let the DJ club spin the disco because DJing was one of the things I still enjoyed in life. In addition to that they really weren’t ready, but I guess throwing them into the deep end of the pool forced them to swim.
I had always enjoyed DJing and it was one of the few things that brought me joy in life. Despite feeling a bit self-conscious about DJing for a group of kids, I couldn’t resist the opportunity to get behind the decks. My aunt always says that dreams come true and my friend Nate encouraged me to just “get in the mix”. However, I couldn’t shake off the feeling that the phrase “Dreams come true” was just a cliche that wasn’t applicable to most people.
I didn’t want to be known as just the grade school DJ. I had higher aspirations of performing for a more mature audience that appreciated my music and remixes. But, my daily life felt mundane and I struggled to find excitement and fulfillment. Like Alan Watts said, life was a serious game, but when I was DJing, all those worries and doubts disappeared. I couldn’t help but wonder if moving to the city would offer me a chance to showcase my skills as a small-time DJ.
Finding the Silver Lining
If you read my post on taking L’s gracefully. I try to explore how you can walk away with good insights from every outcome. What were the good things I could walk away with this time?
Even though things may not have gone exactly as planned during the student disco, there were still opportunities for growth and positive experiences to be taken away. The possibility of my DJ understudies taking over, being able to fix the speaker, having a meaningful conversation with a student, and embracing the moment all serve as silver linings to the event. These realizations remind us that even when things don’t go exactly as we’d like, there is still room for personal growth and fulfillment.
